Friday, September 19, 2014

Happily missing you

At first,I don't know who you are. I saw you there,in front of me,in a few metres. I was wondering who you are. I don't know what your name is. I don't know where you come from. I know nothing about you. But after that first sight,I know that I like you. I keep on searching for you. I can't get my eyes off of you. Hehe. And from a friend,I get to know your name. I am happy then. :) You know what,everytime I saw you,there's butterflies in my stomach. There's sparks in my heart. I can't stop thinking about you since that day. But now,I even can't see your face. I miss that naughty face. I miss that friendly smiles. I miss your silly jokes. I miss that hugs. Hehe. Anywhere you are,I wish you are having a beautiful life. I am missing you here. But sadly I can't tell you that I miss you so much here. :'( But whatever it is.. I am happy missing you. At least no one can stop me from doing that. :) Wish that one day we will meet again. :')

Happily missing you,

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Saturday, September 6, 2014

The One

The one who will bring back the pieces into one piece.
The one who is care about me all the time.
The one who is love me unconditionally.
The one who is so deeply in love with me.
The one who will try not to break my heart in any way.
The one who knows my insecurities.
The one who will cheer me up during my bad time.
The one who will bring out the best in me.
The one who accept me for who I am.
The one who is telling me that I am beautiful in every way.
The one who will not ashame of me.
The one who will proudly saying I am his.
The one who will make other woman jealous of me for having him in my life.
The one who is never leave me behind.
The one who will try to spend time even though his schedule is pack.
The one who will never stop loving me even though a year has passed.
The one who is willing to bake my favourite dessert.
The one who is appreciate me.
The one who will fight for me and with me in the relationship.
The one who will annoy me every day but never let me sleep at night with tears.
The one who will always give me his back.
The one that will never fail in giving me his attention.
The one who will correct me when I am wrong.
The one who will lead me to the right path.
The one who will keep me on the right track.
The one who will prove me every thing he say is true.
The one who is willing to do my favourite thing with me even though he do not like it.
The one who will love his family and my family.
The one who is responsible and knows his responsibilities.
The one who will ask my hand for marriage.
The one who will prove me that true love does exist.

P/S Dear my future husband,I am here waiting for you patiently. :)

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Sunday, January 12, 2014

Feel nothing

But I'm not strong enough to do that now. One day,for sure,after some times,I will look at you and feel nothing.

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Wednesday, January 8, 2014

It's okay

Now,only God knows what I feel inside,what I've been through,and how miserable my life is. And of course,I know too! :P Because it's my life. But one thing for sure is NO ONE KNOWS. :') Yeah.. Sad fact. But I have no idea of how long will I be like this. Time will tells. Someone told me,in order to be happy,I must choose happiness. "Happiness is a choice". I know. But every time I choose happiness,life brings me down. :') Life hit me so hard that I can't keep holding on happiness. I was afraid to be happy because I know there will be a time that I will cry harder than ever. And I did. :'( I think happily ever after is something that impossible to happen. :') I don't know what God has planned. I'd have gave up on everything,I don't know where my life is going,because I only took it day by day. Such a waste huh?

This sad heart of mine,I don't know how to cheer it up again. Dear heart,I'm sorry. :'( I'm sorry that I tortured you this bad. But please do me a favor. Keep on being strong,will you? :'( It's not wrong for you to miss him,but please don't hurt my eyes and force her to cry. You should make my lips smile again. I know they are a very hard tasks for you to do,but I know you will and can do it. :') I trusted you,my heart. I know how deep it kills you when you heard what he told me last time. I know you can't accept it because I can't as well. :'(

As for me,it is hard to say goodbye,it is hard to forget,it is hard to let go and it is hard to moving on when I still love that person,I still miss him so damn much and still can cry whenever I think about him. I know he didn't feel the same. I know he don't love or miss me or will cry for me anymore. :') It's okay. I understand why. :') I do hope for something that I know won't come true. Silly me. It is not wrong to put some hope anyway. I've decided to wait for him as well. But seeing someone can be happy without you.. Hahaha.. You know you rather die than have to see that happen. It made my hopes die. :') How fast someone can forget everything about you especially of what both of you has been through together,how fast that love died,and how fast they can stop loving you. :'( But that's their choices right? What can we do about that then? Hmm..

I tell myself this,he who sees the sadness in my eyes eventho' I'm smiling in front of him. He who sees my insecurities eventho' I show him how strong I am. He who sees my imperfections but still accept me for who I am. He who will say "I know you're not okay" eventho' I tell him I'm alright. He who know my past but still love me. And he who is willing to take care of me for the rest of his life. I will never let him go. If I found someone like this,I will not wait any longer,I will marry him. :') I've had enough with these heartbreaks,I can't take it anymore. But for now,let me be like this. Alone in my own world for awhile. Let me drowning in my own sadness. I'm still in 'mourning' period. :') And I'm not ready to love again. Let see how things will be. Just go with the flow,Christie. Love your heart please. If you can endure the pain,please do so. :')

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